That is how you know if you are dealing with a wood or a forest.  If the canopy is complete and day light cannot get through the foliage then it is a forest, otherwise it is a wood.  There are also regional variations in what people typically call a gathering of trees.

All of that is irrelevant as both are made up of trees.  They both need the same component parts.

Too often we don’t look at the individual trees, we see them together and call them by their collective noun.

Different trees need different saw blades to cut them down.

The Boy didn’t go to school yesterday morning.  In my head (and from my experience) that is refusing school and therefore there must be an issue with school.  I looked at the forest and decided the trees were pine and that I needed a saw blade suitable for pine.  This sent me down the wrong path, both within my head and practically, because I MUST sort the school problem and then he will go back.

The Mom: Is there something wrong in school?

The Boy: No

TM: If there is something wrong in school we can go in and sort it out, you just have to tell me what the problem is.

TB: There is nothing wrong in school

TM: OK (thinking “But if it isn’t school what could it be?”).  Is there something else wrong?

TB: No

TM: Then why did you refuse to go to school this morning?

TB: I didn’t refuse to go to school this morning.

TM: You did, that is why you are sitting here at noon instead of being in school. (starting to sound a little frustrated)

TB: I didn’t refuse to go to school. (starting to sound a little annoyed)

TM: OK.  Did something stop you going to school?

TB: Yes

TM: Can you tell me what that was?

TB: I wasn’t fully awake until you got back from dropping The Brother to school

TM: Ahhh, so you didn’t not want to go to school, you just couldn’t wake up properly and get out of bed for school

TB: YES!

TM: OK, so that is the problem we need to solve because you are OK with going to school right?

TB: Yes

TM: Is there a problem with your alarm clock?  Is it not going off in the morning?

TB: It does go off, but I turn it off.

TM: Is it too easy to turn it off?

TB: Yes

TM: What if it wasn’t that easy to turn off?

TB: I was already thinking about that.  I was thinking about moving it to the top of the storage unit because then I would have to get out of bed to turn it off and then I would be awake because now I can stay under the covers and turn it off and I don’t really wake up.

TM: That sounds like an awesome possible solution and I am really impressed you came up with it on your own.  I had the same idea but I am glad you said your idea first 😉  You know where Uncle Percy* put his alarm clock, right?

TB: In the pot on the top of the wardrobe

TM: Yup, a clanger alarm clock in a pot on the top of the wardrobe because he couldn’t sleep through the noise and had to get out of bed to turn it off.  You’re not the only one that has a hard time getting up in the morning.

TM: Right, put on your shoes.  We need to go to IKEA to get a long extension cord so that we can plug the clock radio in on top of the storage.

We went to IKEA (he talked the whole time), bought the extension cord, moved the alarm clock, fixed the time on it, and he went to bed on schedule.  He went to school this morning.

I am not assuming that this will be a lasting solution but it is a solution to the ACTUAL problem, not what I decided the problem must be.  It is too easy, as the adult, to decide what the problem is and set about solving it without stopping to figure out what the problem actually is.

I saw a problem, decided what the issue was and set about solving it.

Only problem with that plan was… I got the issue wrong and therefore came up with the wrong solution and in the process I didn’t let The Boy know that I was happy to listen to him, to hear him and to help him solve the actual problem.

There is no need to fell the whole forest.  Find the tree you are looking for, figure out the right saw blade needed, grab hold of a handle each and start sawing together.