I was 13 the first time I stayed up until silly o’clock to watch the Oscars. I watched it with my mother, who consented to me staying up so late.

Recently she told me that long after I moved out she continued to watch it into the night.

This afternoon The Boy got in touch to ask for permission to stay up late in 3.5 weeks. No demands, and a well worded statement of desire. I know many would look at the “please” in the final request and consider the interaction polite. I do appreciate the please but the politeness exists throughout the exchange.

He is 14. He could come up with shopping list of ways to “get around” me on the night. He chose to be honest. To express his desire. To have a conversation. In doing that he opened himself to hearing my concerns, and potentially be told no.

The arrow marks the point in the exchange where I remembered watching the Oscars, a year younger than he is now.

When I shared the conversation with Fred, he reminisced about watching a sporting event as a child, explaining that he had to get up for school the next day.

So I said yes, and we agreed to make a plan closer to the day.

TO BE CONTINUED…